Run-in with a Fictional Creature

Last night at about 7 pm I was walking home from visiting a friend. As I turned the corner onto my street I saw a guy pull over in his car, park it, hop out, and stand next to another car. I didn't give it two seconds of thought at first, because living in a busy area has made people practically invisible to me. I don't really notice them and they don't really notice me. Still, as I walked closer I noticed that he was standing very straight with both his hands down near his belt buckle. At this point I was pretty sure he was "relieving" himself. This road is fairly busy, and the car he was standing next to is very close to some much more secluded areas so I was considering the possibility that he was actually a flasher and started to move toward the other side of the street. As I was moving I saw him get back in his car and curiosity got the best of me.

I passed the car and determined that, yes, he was actually peeing on the car. I also noticed that he had not actually left, he was still sitting in his parked vehicle. After I passed I noticed him get out and continue to pee on the car. This leads me to the real point of this post: what was he thinking? I have made a list of possible thought processes and reasons why they don't make sense.

Possible Reasons to Urinate on a Car and Reasons Why Those Reasons aren't Reasonable.

1) He really, REALLY had to pee. -- There is a parking lot directly across the street from where he was. At this time of night it is quiet and abandoned. Adjacent to that parking lot are many alleys between buildings. many of these have a dumpster in them which would provide shelter on three sides and make it less likely he get brought up on flashing charges. Also if he wanted to kick it 2oth century style, there is a 24 hour Dunkin' Donuts about a two minute drive away with a public bathroom.

2) He is getting revenge on the car's owner. -- The car in question is almost always parked on the street. It is my guess that the owner only uses it for weekend travel. By the time he sees the car next he will have no idea that anyone peed on it. Also there is significant body damage to the car so if he was attempting to damage the car no one will really notice that either.

3) He was drunk.-- at 7 pm, on a Wednesday, while driving when public transportation in easily accessible.

4) He was high. -- same reasons as before.

5) He was attempting to purchase the vehicle in the same manner that my dog "purchases" every inch of our morning walk. -- There are two main problems here. One is that the owner can simply buy the car back in the same way. The second is that he is not actually a dog.

6) He is a werewolf and was in the middle of transitioning at the moment. -- I've got nothing. I give him a pass and find this behavior 100% acceptable is he was a werewolf in a transitional moment between human and wolf.

So there you have it. I saw a werewolf last night. I will file this under Run-ins with Fictional Creatures right next to the time S and I hit a yeti. I hope my next run in is with a jackalope. Also I promise that this will be my last post about peeing on things for a while.